Good Morning September 2018! Here I am!
I literally feel as if I have just woken up from a 4 year slumber! It’s actually a crazy and incredible feeling! Good morning September!
It’s as if life has just returned to my being, I’m just trying to figure this all out as I write, so hang in there!
September is a mad month really, it’s when all the summer festival madness fades and also the month in which I find myself revisiting my diagnosis of Hodgkins Lymphoma from back in September 2014. I was on some kind of auto pilot from that date on I think. I went pretty much straight into treatment and was in full remission within six months come Spring 2015. It is amazing and unbelievable yet paired with a mind fuck because it almost went by without me actually processing it.
I had some time to get to know the new and lesser haired me in that year, plus some of my senses were jolted awake when I chose to be strapped to a large man and skydived for Lymphoma Action.
Yet a year on from my remission, and six months from the skydive, in April 2016 we learned that my Dad had inoperable pancreatic cancer. To think both me and my Dad were seriously sick at the same time is absolutely mental. Auto-pilot mode once again. Fight or flight, right? I had barely landed.
To add to the fun I had a total hip replacement later in 2016, this was unrelated to the blood cancer. I had osteoarthritis for a long time in my left hip so I hopped off to Guys Hospital. As I was discharged my Dad was admitted to Poole Hospital with an infection. If you know cancer, you know how this song goes. Within three months the inevitable happened and we lost him. I watched him fade away before me, at home and in the hospice. It’s fucking horrible seeing someone you love in that position and I don’t think I will ever get those visions out of my mind, ever. They are just slightly easier to deal with almost two years on.
It has taken a while but the Zo you know is functioning and I am well. I have regained stability now that I’m settled in my new home, plus I have a new radio show residency! The solid consistency in these four foggy years from that of my husband, my good friends and my work at Sundown Festival has kept me real!
Thanks to you all, here I am! And good morning to you! x